Whole Leaders, Wild Trust

CHAPTER 13Motivated: Inspire the Deeper Forces Behind Your Effort

A whole and trusted leader is motivated, and interested in the motivations of others.

Have you ever found yourself waiting on someone—teammate, friend, partner—to do what they said they’d do, and they just don’t? You know they’re capable. You’ve seen it. But the follow-through never comes. It’s frustrating, because when people repeatedly drop the ball, our trust in them starts to erode. But here’s a harder question: What if there’s more going on than just their failure? What if part of the story is us?

Yes, there are moments when people genuinely let us down. But our ability—and theirs—to perform, to follow through, and to learn something new isn’t just about skill or good intentions. It’s about motivation. Motivation is the spark, the fuel, the drive behind everything we do. It’s not just whether we can do something, but whether we have the energy and fire to actually do it. And here’s the trap: we tend to believe that what motivates us should motivate everyone else. It doesn’t. When we start recognizing that people are driven by different things—purpose, achievement, connection, challenge—we stop managing behavior and start lighting fires.

If we want to become whole and trusted leaders, we need to get more honest about what moves us—and what moves the people around us. Because motivation fuels performance. And performance, repeated and consistent, builds trust. Not just trust in outcomes, but trust in each ...