HBR Guide to Dealing with Conflict (HBR Guide Series)

CHAPTER 5

Get Ready for the Conversation

Once you’ve resolved to directly address the conflict, it’s tempting to have the conversation immediately. But taking time to prepare will help you remain calm and increase the chances that you and your counterpart will come away with a better solution than either of you could have predicted.

Below are several guidelines to help you prepare for a productive discussion.

Check Your Mindset

If you’re getting yourself ready for a conversation that you’ve labeled “difficult,” you’re more likely to feel nervous, stressed, angry, or upset. To minimize those negative emotions, try to think about it as a non-charged conversation, suggests Jean-François Manzoni. For example, instead of giving negative feedback, ...