If it wasn't for the coffee, I'd have no identifiable personality whatsoever.
You build deeper emotional connections when you interact with buyers and stakeholders based on who they are—not who you are. Ultra-high performers (UHPs) are masters at this. They are keenly self-aware of their behavioral style, values, and beliefs, and they are confident enough to adjust their style to deal with people with differing communication styles.
Stakeholders tend to like, be attracted to, and be more trusting of people who are like them. Therefore, when you flex your preferred or dominant communication style to complement that of the other person, that person will be more open to connecting and answering your questions. It's easier for others to hear and understand you when you are communicating in a style language that they understand.
We each have a unique style of dealing with the world around us. Some people are direct, whereas others beat around the bush. Some people speak slowly and exhibit little emotion, whereas others are more animated. People may be direct and driven, analytical and careful, focused on building consensus, or social and outgoing.
Flexing your style essentially means adjusting your approach and interpersonal behaviors for each individual so that they are more comfortable working with you; thus, easing their anxiety and opening the door for an emotional connection.