Me First

Our afflictionsWhere we waste our time

It’s ridiculous how afflicted we are — we high-achieving women. I am not an expert on these afflictions, but as a former fellow sufferer and now having worked with many of you, I certainly have some pretty strong opinions that I want to share.

From the time we were young girls, we were inundated with a never-ending barrage of subliminal and overt messaging telling us that, as females, not only can we have it all, but we deserve it all. Anything boys can do we can do too — the messaging states — because we are as smart, as brave, as capable and as deserving to win the scholarship, to be the CEO, the managing director, the head surgeon, the partner of the law firm, the next astronaut to orbit the earth, the leader of the country, or the person at the helm. Ostensibly, there are no barriers to what we can achieve because all things being equal, we are equal.

And yet, biology got in the way. We have wombs, you see, which means we are the only ones who can grow and spit out the babies. And from the moment that little sprog takes hold, the messaging suddenly changes. Now, it’s not so much, ‘You can be the CEO’ — it’s more, ‘How long are you going to take off work?’ (Really!? Just six weeks?! Is that all? But how will you bond with the baby?); ‘Breast is best you know — are you planning to breastfeed your baby?’ (Really? You are going to formula feed? Goodness, is that good for the baby’s immune system?); ‘You must be looking forward to having ...