Rules of Life, The, 4th Edition

RULE 82

Give your kids responsibilities

Children grow up and leave home. They go from helpless babies to mature adults who have sex and drink beer while your back is turned. The secret is to try and keep pace with them. As they grow you have to back off more and let them do more. You have to resist the urge to do everything for them and let them fry eggs^* or paint dustbins^** for themselves.

It’s a delicate balancing act. You can’t give them more responsibility than they can handle, but at the same time you can’t hold them back. And when you do let them fry eggs or paint dustbins for the first time, they are going to make a mess – yolk on the cooker, paint on the garage floor. It’s the mess that most often makes a parent say, ‘No, you can’t’. ...