Coach Me! Your Personal Board of Directors

18 How to Deal with Deeper, Coaching-Resistant Behaviors

Ron Carucci

Ron is the co-founder and managing partner at Navalent, working with CEOs and executives pursuing transformational change for their organizations, leaders, and industries. Ron is the author of nine books, including the award winning To Be Honest, a regular contributor to Forbes and Harvard Business Review, a two-time TEDx speaker, and a member of the MG100 coaches community.

“Why do I keep doing that?”

This is a common lament of leaders whose troubling behaviors appear at the most inopportune times. With the best of intentions and effort, some leaders are not able to achieve or sustain changes to unwanted behaviors.

I worked with the division president of a global professional services firm. For the purposes of this story, we will call him Andy. He was gregarious and articulate, with an infectious energy that earned him high regard. But these positive qualities were counteracted by a stubborn need to be right, crave the spotlight, and talk incessantly. Andy said to me, “I really do care about my people. I want to inspire them. I want them to feel energized. But I just can’t reign in my stubbornness, and it keeps getting me into trouble.” One interviewee told me, “Andy’s a great guy, but he’ll never change. He can’t listen, and if you suggest he’s wrong, he’ll talk non-stop, or belittle you, until you give in.”

Some disturbing leadership behaviors are resistant to coaching, training, or other developmental ...