The Rules of Love, 2nd Edition

RULE 54

Don’t control them

There’s a fine line between over-protectiveness and bullying. I know people who bully their partner in no uncertain terms. Some do it aggressively while others do it quietly but firmly. They insist their partner does things a certain way, and use moodiness and atmosphere and non-cooperation to ensure that their partner complies.

I know one man who always insists that the kitchen table is kept clear at all times. His partner would like to be able to use it to put things on from time to time – it is a table after all – but he refuses to countenance anything being put on it other than crockery and cutlery at mealtimes. This is not open to discussion, and she is not allowed an opinion on the matter. Now if this were an ...