Talking to Crazy

 

chapter 10

Time Travel

Getting an Irrational Person toStop Dwelling on the Past andFocus Instead on the Future

I Got The Idea for what I call the Time Travel technique from Marshall Goldsmith, a good friend and the author of What Got You Here Won’t Get You There. Here’s his advice: Rather than focusing on the past or the present, focus on the future you haven’t messed up yet.

In other words, don’t keep going round and round in the same tired conversation with an irrational person: “You never follow through.” “You always undermine me.” “You never take responsibility.” “You’ve always let me down.” Instead, visualize tomorrow or next year, or picture your lives a decade from now. And then help the person see into that future with you.

For instance, ...