The Art of Helping

Summary

We can test the comprehensiveness and accuracy of our personalized responses to the helpees’ expressions. We begin by simply attending and responding interchangeably. Then we offer personalized responses. We can rate the comprehensiveness and accuracy of our personalizing the helpees’ experiences as follows:

High personalizing	— Accurately personalized problems, goals and feelings incorporating helpees’ response deficits and assets
Moderate personalizing	— Accurately personalized meaning incorporating personal assumptions and implications of experience
Low personalizing	— Accurate responsiveness to meaning

As can be seen, the low levels of personalizing are consistent with the high levels of responsiveness (feeling and content). ...