The Rules of People

RULE 32

Put your oxygen mask on first

It’s important to help people who need it, for two overriding reasons in particular. The first is the glaringly obvious one that – well, they need it. And the other is that helping other people makes you feel good about yourself.⁹ So ideally you should help out wherever help is wanted, and everyone’s a winner.

Hang on a minute though. This works fine if you’re carrying someone’s heavy shopping, or giving a stranger directions, or cooking dinner for your exhausted partner, or photocopying a colleague’s report, or saving a bird with an injured wing. But suppose your friend is struggling with grief, or one of your family has been diagnosed bipolar, or your colleague’s marriage is falling apart?

Any one – ...