Crucial Conversations Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High, Second Edition, 2nd Edition
by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, Al Switzler
OUR STORIES
Nothing in this world is good or bad, but thinking makes it so.
—WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
Stories provide our rationale for what’s going on. They’re our interpretations of the facts. They help explain what we see and hear. They’re theories we use to explain why, how, and what. For instance, Maria asks: “Why does Louis take over? He doesn’t trust my ability to communicate. He thinks that because I’m a woman, people won’t listen to me.”
Our stories also help explain how. “How am I supposed to judge all of this? Is this a good or a bad thing? Louis thinks I’m incompetent, and this is bad.”
Finally, a story might also include what. “What should I do about all this? If I say something, he’ll think I’m a whiner or oversensitive or militant, ...
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