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Emotional Intelligence for IT Professionals by Emília M. Ludovino

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Consequences of a bad self-expression

When you don't express your emotions clearly, respectfully, and safely, and instead dump your emotions on others or suppress them hoping that they go away, many misunderstandings will arise causing a lot of problems:

  • When you don't explain in a clear, respectful, and safe way to others how you feel, they will try to guess how you feel and get it wrong. Being silent about your feelings does not mean that people will ignore them--they will just try to work it out for themselves and they may get it wrong. And in the absence of any declaration from you to the contrary, they will presume that their guess is right, then they may tell others. All this can foster negative gossip, a lack of trust, and grave misunderstandings. ...

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